How to Share Your Hopes with Your Children

Tell your child what you hope for in his or her life. Share with your child what you hope for your child for all eternity.

Nearly all parents hope their children will have

  • long life and health.
  • their material needs met.
  • friends and loving relationships.
  • work that is fulfilling.
  • noble character traits.

Parents the world over hope that their children will always have enough good food to eat and clean water to drink, a safe place to sleep, warmth in the cold, relief in the heat, and comfortable shelter.

Share  Hopes with Children

Tell your children you hope they will have good friends, with whom they can talk, pray and share expe­riences; coworkers, with whom they can accomplish goals; and mentors, from whom they may learn.

Whether framed in terms of a career or an avocation, most parents hope for their children the fulfillment found in the completion of worthy tasks or goals.

Every parent will no doubt help define the values his or her child will carry into the world and apply to life. Honesty, fidelity, kindness, patience, peace, joy, love, humility, confidence and self-esteem are among the traits nearly every parent hopes for his or her child. Compliance with the laws of the land, patriotism, volun­tary service—these, too, are valueable traits. Share with your child the type of person you hope he or she will be: cool-headed in emergencies, compassionate in tragedies, angry at injustice, bold to speak for the weak, eager to help in times of need, and quick to respond to the hurts of others.

Share, too, your deepest desires for your child’s spiri­tual growth. Lou and Mindy travel a great deal with their children. On long car trips they sometimes ask their children, “What do you suppose our lives will be like five hundred years from now?” They imagine heaven and the things they will each be doing and say­ing. They discuss the relationship between what they do now and the life they anticipate enjoying later. They also talk seriously about the importance of doing certain things and taking certain stands now for the sake of life on earth. They have helped their children, over those miles, to become adept at voicing a theology, framing a worldview, and forging a personal philosophy for living.

Many of your hopes and aspirations can be shared by wrapping your ideas around simple everyday activities. “I’m so glad you were honest in telling me the truth. Lying has terrible consequences—people go to prison for lying, some people destroy their families and their marriages because they lie, some people end up in mental institutions because they make lying a pattern in their lives. I don’t want any of those things to happen to you.”

Don’t pontificate. Don’t preach. Don’t harp. Don’t nag. A paragraph of mom-philosophy, a sentence or two of dad-theology can go along way if spoken sincerely, at a time when you and your child are alone and you both are focused on communicating with each other. Nearly everything you say can be understood by your child, even a rebellious, angry teenager, if you don’t demand that your child follow your lead or agree with you with­out question. Confront him or her with issues and op­tions that you hope he or she will ponder or an idea or opinion that you hope he or she will weigh carefully.

A child whose parents share their deepest goals and hopes for his or her life is a child who says, “Mom thinks I can experience this. Dad thinks I can be a per­son who bears these qualities. They have hope for my future; they believe I will become a solid citizen and a loving and generous adult.” When you value a child’s future, the child will value his or her own future too.

Filed Under: Family & Relationships


About the Author: Roberta Southworth is a psychiatrist by profession. She likes to help out people by writing informative tips on how people can to solve their family and relationship issues. She is currently staying in Ireland. She has 5 years of couple counseling experience.

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