Each child is an individual, with his own particular emotional needs and his own particular likes and dislikes; each needs love and attention in varying amounts and in different ways. Therefore, treating each of your children equally is not the same as treating them fairly.
The idea that the best way to raise children is to treat them identically—by giving them all the same toys, activities, or opportunities—is a mistake and will not satisfy anyone.
You may be tempted to buy each of your children identical indoor kids playhouse because that way they can’t complain about one getting something better than the others. If one gets to go to skating lessons, they all must go to skating lessons. This tactic does not take into account each child’s individuality and means that one or more of them will get something they don’t like or want! Treating your children fairly means taking each child’s individual needs into account. For example, if one takes swimming lessons, another might be allowed to join a drama club.
Even if parents adopt a policy of equal treatment, the children will find that the outside world takes a different approach. Schools encourage children to progress at their own pace. Clubs, whether sports organizations or scouting, encourage each member to develop mastery in different areas, depending on his skills. Individual differences make life interesting. A child who lives in an environment that tries to create equality in everything will receive an abrupt jolt when he ventures beyond the family home. Try to strive for a family structure in which every member has equal opportunities to develop his full potential, even though this may result in different activities and lifestyles for different family members.